performing arts
kurzlich@gmail.com says:
i went to go recce labrador part
kurzlich@gmail.com says:
*par
kurzlich@gmail.com says:
*parl
kurzlich@gmail.com says:
PARK
kurzlich@gmail.com says:
SKLSFLJ
mistakes..
mistakes in life, mistakes in words, mistakes in msn, mistakes in a P word, a mistake i was so afraid of.. a mistake which i think ruins my reputation as a musician bit by bit.. the mistake of PERFORMANCE
I’m certain once again..
After 2 nights of consecutive performances, i’m certain again that.. I truly enjoy performing.. i dunno why but.. i just enjoy the stage.. enjoy the interaction with fellow performers and audience.. enjoy sharing something i enjoy with people who enjoy sharing it and others who appreciate what we’re doing..
I’m very grateful tonight to God as I’m typing this for a number of reasons.. this is my first symphonic band performance since joining yfc PArts.. and.. and i found back the true joy of performing.. i found that kind of excitement and joy i had in sec 2 playing desafinando at marina auditorium.. the true spirit of performing and enjoying it..
somehow along the way as i grew in the arts, it became competitive.. so much so that i was overly concerned about hitting the right notes more than whether i was enjoying it or not.. i was more particular about others’ articulation and intonation more than if we’re having the mo qi.. most of all.. i was sucked into the world’s mold that music is competition.. be the best or play the rests..
no.. God did not create music to stress me with all that i have been going thru all these years.. probably its a good thing that i’m always for perfection.. but iskandar once told me mistakes are all part and parcel of a performance.. i couldn’t accept that… i always felt really bad and pissed when i made small mistakes that no one could tell.. needless to say, i was devasted when i made major ones which pple could tell.. i still remembered the “bitter with myself” attitude i gave to my relatives when they came to one of my syo concerts because i made mistakes.. how one wrong note in stravinsky’s firebird concerto can practically ruin my whole night..
but tonite.. God’s merciful.. God allowed me to drop all the baggage… just depend on Him.. did i say my scores were left in school? haha.. just depend on Him.. mistakes yes.. but so? i enjoyed the performance.. and i believe the audience enjoyed it too with the many encouraging and impressed comments.. all glory be to God.. how could i have played and enjoyed what i did without Him..
if ever one day i forget this joy of performing after i enter uni.. pls remind me.. God.. thank you for making me a performer.. a performer for u.. to play for u and only for You O Lord
Teach me O Lord to follow your decrees, and i will follow them to the end. Psalm 119:33
